War on Divorce

My parents are heading toward divorce but want to avoid it, how can I help?

I am 17 and a senior in high school. My parents simply aren't loving toward each other.

Public Comments

1. Act innocent, cry in front of them..
2. let them go apart
3. This may be really hard on both of them so be an asset not a liability.
4. make them love themselves
5. Im sorry to hear your in this situation, the only thing that i can suggest is that you talk to the most understanding parent about what your seeing and ask them to get counciling for it on your behalf.
6. Maybe it's for the best. My parents divorced when I was a senior (it was the end of their second marriage). If they don't love each other, there's really no repairing that. I feel for you, though, and am sorry to see it happen.
7. well for me prayer seems to help. but if you dont belive in that try to get them together as much as possible. remind them why thet got married in the first place.
8. omg same thing here!! i'm 16. mum always threatens us that shes about to walk out. its horrible! i think mine are trying to avoid it too i'd love to know how to help
9. try not to compare your opinion of loving with theirs. you are possibly misreading the situation.
10. get a kitten and paint your self blue, then sacrifice the kitten to the heathen gods of old.......your parents must stay together in order to keep one from blaming the other in court as to whose fault your craziness is.
11. You can't help. It is not your burden to carry. This is a part of their relationship that isn't about you and you cannot fix it. You'll just have to step back and let them do what they're going to do. Maybe they'll seek marriage counseling and work it out. If they don't, you need to know that it's not your fault. There are even people who love each other but can't always be married and/or live together.
12. Honey they may not be loving in front of you but you don't know what happens when you are not looking. Sometimes a look from one to the other says it all. Maybe things are rocky. You don't know the whole story. All you can do is be 17 and let them worry about thier marriage. It is not up to you to do anything but love them as your mom and Dad and let them do what is best for them. You have just started your life, let them live the rest of thiers the way they want and need to. You can't do anything for them.Sometimes divorce is all that will cure a bad marriage. You worry about getting into college and living your life and let them live thiers. If you need to talk let me know.
13. This is really out of ur hands.. it is up to them.. just ask them to attend counseling.. and if it was meant to be.. they will really try hard to make it.. but there may be something u are not aware of.... i am sorry.. seems to be more broken home today..
14. nothing its probably been brewing for some time and now that your almost done with school they are probably having a hard time not showing each other exactly how much they realy dont love each other, that sh*t happens all the time
15. ohhh im sorry to hear that... but since your'e there child they should pay more attention to their kids now since they are headin to divorce.... i think you should sit there n have a talk with your parents and let them know how you really feel about them. but at the same time you gota understand that if they int tryna be with eachother let them be cuz there times when the mom cheats on the dad or theres time when the dad cheats on the mom.. or mybe they int fillin eachother no more if they arent fillin eachother try sendin them on a dinner together just them two alone or somewhere they use to hangout b4 they got married trust me its gona bring back memories n make them realize wat theyr doing.... i hope i answered your question....
16. I would say the best thing you could do for them is try and talk with them separately and get them to remember the good old times the times when they were first together. Everybody gets together for a reason and falls in love however they tend to forget about that and stop working on their marriage which always takes work and people tend to forget that. Get them to remember the fun things they used to do together. The loving gestures they used to show each other. Flowers, cards. backrubs, walks, long drives. The first place they met. Whatever it was sometimes this sparks those memories and rekindles the love. Also remind them that marriage is work. But do it separately first. Once you get them together let them know how you feel let them know how the divorce will affect you just ask them not to talk and hear you out. I am sure you will know what to say there. Then after all that you just have to hope for the best. They are the ones who will have to put in the effort. Good luck to you and your family.
17. This is a common problem, one which most people who become divorced go through (including myself). They say that counseling may work, and it's worth a try. The problem with most cases is that the people in a relationship grow apart. This is attributed to the stress that happens over time when responsibility becomes a burden, and each partner blames the other for lack thereof. You must understand that all humans grow. Some grow more than others. With growth comes change, and that change may not be what each expected, so one or the other will opt for a way out. I wish I could help you out, but it's a problem of your parents that only they can decide if it can be fixed, or it's too far gone and must end with divorce. The only thing you can do is show support for each of them, knowing that should their relationship end, they can at least depend on you to continue a parent/child relationship...and not that you will lay blame on one or the other. Usually, both parties to the relationship have a certain degree of blame, and to try and weigh one over the other will only make matters worse. Accept that this is fundamental in our way of life as it evolved. There simply is too much pressure of making ends meet in households today for one to expect success in all relationships. Be loving and supportive, because both will be hurting should divorce be the only way out.
18. Here's the simplest explanation. They ain't getting divorced because of you, so nothing YOU do is going to change their minds. And if, for some reason, they ARE getting divorced because of you, then it's pretty much too late for you to change it now.