War on Divorce
I found a plate with pot residue and one joker wrapper in my sons room....?
my heart is broken. He just turned 16. He is a wonderful boy, great athlete, who always talked about how much he disliked people who smoke pot...and they were losers.. He is the least likely person that anyone would suspect to do this... we just changed towns and schools (which was his idea and he is happy) due to divorce and I wonder what to do...what should his punishment be? We talked for hours about how he can ruin his life just by being with other people who do it at the same party..should it get busted etc.. not to mention what would happen if HE did it himself. help ?
Public Comments
- You need to talk some more, maybe get counseling divorce is very hard on kids. Talk and see whats really bothering him, also new town and school thats hard too! Don't give up, and its not the end of the world. Be his parent and friend through this difficult time. Counseling away from the school would be best too! Good Luck!
- i hate to be the one to say this but pot is ok. He s not doing hard core drugs so maybe its just making him relax and forget about the divorce.As long as his grades dont slip and hes doent turn into a bad son let it be. I know you dont want to hear this but its the truth
- as a parent you have to understand that your childeren are going to explore things you have to not stress to much you have not done anyhting wrong as a parent! In the bible its says childeren will stray but as long as you instiled the best in them they will come back, be patient and understanding you have done your part, now he has to do his part!
- Just a note: "Do ou have any idea what will happen to "you" if/when this stuff is found in your house?, even if it's not yours?" and, if they do a vaccuum and find it in your carpet....couch....chairs....or any other place? (other than the room?) Let's see...since "you have allowed this to be in yor house, and continue in your house for sometime..." and the evidence is "all over the place!", then..the law will automatically assume the "worst", you are dealing, using, allowing a minor to use,having others over to your house to use, ...and all they hae to do is find a few "seeds" here and there...or a few traces of grass..or some pieces of those "papers" in various places of "your home" then try to prove otherwise! "Peace!" Well, i don't know! What do you think!
- You need to come down on him---HARD! Both of my stepsons have experimented with Pot, and we don't want it anywhere near our home or our lives! Our oldest got arrested for possession during a routine spot check last year--try living down THAT embarrassment! Your son needs to understand that what he did was wrong on so many levels! Not just for his own health and safety, but because all of his actions effect you as well. I would talk grounding, and I mean SERIOUS grounding! I wouldn't let him out for a good long time, revoke his driving privelages for at least three months (if he drives) and when I did start letting him out in small increments over time, I would demand to know where he is, who his friends are, and there would be no way in hell he'd be out after a certain hour. Your blinders are off, so keep them off and punish him so he'll never forget it. My hubby didn't treat what my stepson did as a big deal, and he continued to do it. After brightening up, we now make him submitt to urine tests once a month (you can get the kits in the drug store), because if he is going to drugs he is not going to live here. You have got to crack down on this kid. Lots of luck to you! PS---It's not the divorce---he may try to use that as an excuse for everything that goes wrong from here on out if you let him use it this time. We've also had experience with that in this house. No matter what happens around him, he's got a choice. He needs to make the right one!
- the punishment should be rehab if you want him to stay off drugs and not get into heavier ones. He will protest but will thank you later!
- you need to talk to him about the consequences. dont put him into rehad b/c he doesn't have a drug problem yet. you need to educate him and hope he makes the wisest descision for himself. punishment unfortunatelty will do little in this instance. you should probably be thankful this is his drug of choice and not alcohol, ciggarettes or harder drugs. because the only profound repercussions are legal
