War on Divorce

Tips in surviving the holidays when the marriage is broken?

Need tips in surviving the holidays for the kids sake. I'm looking at the divorce issue in the new year due to husband having had an affair. It's been about 1.5 years since I took him back and things initially were getting better however as I feared he couldn't maintain it. So to avoid the kids having Xmas holidays being bad memory due to their parents relationship... I need tips to get through it. Anyone?

Public Comments

1. Christmas is suppose to be a time of selflessness. A time for thankfulness. A time for reflection of all that is good. And a time to appreciate our blessings in life. Its hard, I know I have been their. But, however, your reaction to all of this could impact them for the rest of their lives. You have to bring joy in their world and stop the war for now so you can appreciate and they can be happy. Divorce is not an evil nor ugly thing. Unfortunate yes, but neither the two. This is a time of peace and thankfulness. You children's eyes light up no other way during this time of year. So, to get through it, take a knee ask for peace in your life smile at someone and especially your children and perseverance and love will guide you through the rest... God bless you.
2. I went through the same thing. Luckily, my ex was kind enough to agree to "fake it" during the holidays. I thought it was important to give my kids one last, fun, Christmas with good memories. We put our bad feelings on the back burner till after the holidays and we broke up in the new year. It was very symbolic to start the new year fresh. By the way, that was 16 years ago and my ex never forgave himself for screwing up a good thing. Best of luck to you and remember to put the kids first.
3. I have friends that have amicably agreed to divorce... but are still going to counseling once a week for an hour together so that they can mutually and agreeably parent their children well together (although separately). It's working out well for them. If an issue comes up... like a holiday or a dance recital or if there is tension over the arrangement in any way... they hash it out with a licensed therapist who helps them to remain civil and friendly and agreeable...and work through parenting issues (not in front of the kids or by themselves). They get an unbiased individuals opinion... and they don't have to argue. It's working out well for them and their children are doing well because Mom and Dad are on the same page... even though they're not together anymore. They've agreed to continue doing this until they have no ill feelings toward one another and are able to deal with issues on their own without allowing personal feelings to cloud their views.
4. mine left and did not wait but is there really a good time to do it ?